Omaha Mall Shooting - The Omaha Mall Shooting Is A Clear Signal
As I was establishment for a presentation to a group of women in Germany about identifying challenges and recommending solutions for children of deployed troops, I heard the news that a 19 year-old boy had shot and killed eight people, and wounded five, before he took his own life. The Omaha mall shooting was something beyond understanding to the residents of Omaha, Nebraska. That's right, Omaha, Nebraska, the breadbasket of our nation, Middle America.
Omaha Mall Shooting - The Omaha Mall Shooting Is A Clear Signal
The location doesn't seem to matter any more: Omaha, Nebraska; Finland; Amish country; Virginia Tech; Salt Lake City, Cleveland, Crandon, Wisconsin; Las Vegas and most recently, Louisiana State University. What does matter is that young males are looking for recognition through acts of violence and we are baffled, unprepared and fearfully waiting improbable copycat incidents. Many are dedicated to tracking and understanding the lives of these young men who are called, "Spree Killers." What has been the smoldering anger starts long before the act is committed. These disturbed young men are gathering inspiration from predecessors, such as Erik Harris and Dylan Klebold, killers of the Columbine High School massacre in 1999. They are nothing else but "idolized and considered to be heroes," says Montgomery County, Pennsylvania District Attorney, Bruce Castor.
It was more than Robert Hawkins could cope with; dropping out of high school and shortly afterwards being kicked out of the house by his family. The break-up of a long-time girlfriend and losing his job could have been the tipping point. Like a pressure cooker exploding as a corollary of not releasing steam, Hawkins carried out his plan for a mall shooting and randomly took the lives of as many population as potential before he took his own. "It's too late--I'm sorry for everything--I'll no longer be a burden--Now I'll be famous," were words from his suicide note, also expressing what a discontentment he was to everyone. At 14, when ideally young men are getting a part-time job, shooting hoop, and discovering their evolution into the teen years, Robert Hawkins was put in a home for troubled youths, where he was reportedly harassed which was only a measure of his approximately five-year history of distraught behavior.
What do you believe to be the precursor for someone being bullied and treated like an outcast, as were those who committed these heinous crimes? I'd like to offer three important aspects to consider: parental and societal role modeling, brain formation and a failing educational system.
A. In 1962 Dorothy Law Nolte wrote wise words to for all of us to reflect upon: Children Learn What They Live
If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, then learn to fight.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to be shy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with tolerance, they learn to be patient.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with praise, they learn to appreciate.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with acceptance and friendship, they learn to find love in the world.
Our children, just as with the children of the Omaha Mall Shooting, do not deserve our baggage. But how many prospective parents are willing to embrace and process the past before children are conceived? How many are willing to make the changes that will enhance their life? First comes the desire to be in harmony within and to set the intention for peace of mind, which requires working through the pain and issues of the past-the stories that do not reflect our true nature. I've found lack of self-worth to be the coarse denominator surrounded by my clients. If we don't feel worthy, do what it takes to work through the hurtful, negative and sabotaging beliefs to the realization that deserving to be happy, successful and successful is nothing else but our birthright. This could very well be a lifelong process. We can't give something we don't have. For example, after presenting a workshop on feelings awareness to teachers, one young gal confided in me confessing, "I'm chicken to discuss feelings in my classroom, because I don't understand my own. How could I help a pupil with his?"
*How do we give the needed personal attention, if the child in us feels he's been a burden?
*How do we reply special characteristics and gifts, if the child in us feels she's never been noticed?
*How do we accept and encourage the child to express their unique ideas, if the child in us feels shut down and judged?
A teenager with a low self-esteem will put down his own talents, and because of feeling he has no worth, value or power, will be nothing else but influenced by others. In addition, he will become defenseless and feel righteous in blaming others.
Vulnerability, fears, and unrecognized emotions, are masked by his frustration. We've got to be role-modeling every day in a determined manner that will grow a itsybitsy sprout into a strong, healthy, mature, secure, and loving adult knowing of his/her gifts to contribute to mother Earth to make it a good place. As an adult, do you model trust and worth?
B. Results from the latest brain explore is now revealing data that challenges the idea that the hardwiring of a life is set during those first three to five years of life. "Inside the Teen Age Brain," a Pbs special, disclosed current facts based on a million scanning engine at the University of Minnesota that has opened windows into the brain. Dr. Charles Nelson, Neuroscientist and psychologist, surrounded by others, has discovered profound evidence that indicates the frontal cortex is undergoing an unexpected increase spurt during these vulnerable years-vulnerable for the brain and for the teen. Vulnerable because it could be responsible for the greatest mood swings that many teens experience.
More explore was done with photos depicting a range of emotions were shown to teens while their brain was being scanned. It showed that they were not able to identify and identify accurately the emotions in the images. an additional one major discovery revealed that many teens are experiencing a major sleep disorder. Skills tests were administered to teens who had more sleep verses those who had less. The ones with more sleep had improved scores, were more alert and more engaged.
So what does all this mean? It means that all things changes. It means that we may now have new evidence, which would allow us to good understand teenagers. It means that the pendulum also swings in the area of brain explore and formulation and that it is our responsibility to be informed, and to merge the new data. We all have to be willing to continually refocus our lenses of perception, then to gawk what works and what doesn't work and be ready to paradigm shift.
At the end of the program, one of the scientists stated that his grandmother use to say, "give children love and ability time." an additional one spoke of the enduring lesson for parents being "relationships, people, connections-these are what makes the biggest difference." Food for opinion on a involved and thoughprovoking subject. Http://www.pbs.org
C. A failing educational ideas with emphasis on testing, testing and more testing is a crucial element in this picture. "Important curriculum is being replaced with testing and it's becoming more and more frustrating and thoughprovoking to teach." I was told by a high school Government teacher. Test scores and paychecks should not be synonymous. An basal fear motivates an archaic ideas of spewing facts to a group of children. In lieu of individually drawing out the child's unique learning style and accentuating the positive.
Dr. Maria Montessori industrialized ideas over 100 years ago based on independence and freedom-"Help me do it myself." Respect for others, spontaneous activity, support, frankness, and caring all contribute to the child's development. They learn at their own pace and pursue materials and topics that are of interest to them. "Students must be able to make choices, cooperate with peers, institute and mouth a sense of order, demonstrate self-discipline, function independently and participate non-competitively in a classroom community." There are only thirty-nine states that have pre-school programs that are paid for by the state, despite data, ideas and explore suggesting that an speculation in early childhood amelioration will pay off by manufacture a primary dissimilarity in a child's learning success.
Violence is a learned behavior--a learned behavior that could lead to a mall shooting. It's learned at home, in school, through games, the media and society. What are we teaching our children? Gandhi's, grandson, Arun Gandhi said, "If we were to gawk our own lives, we will find that many conflicts emerge from two main sources-our ability to deal with anger positively, and our inability to build good relationships. If we could learn these two things, we would be able to sell out violence in human society by as much as 90%." That's quite a statement. And what about learning how to avoid friction all together, through the art of attending to healthy, strong and meaningful interactions, based on honesty and openness, practicing the art and skill of nonviolent communicate? Let's merge this into our educational system.
How do we stop kids from killing kids? Azim Khamisa, author of From Murder to Forgiveness, speaks from experience, as his 20-year-old son, Tariq was shot down when he was delivering a pizza. His words say it all. "I see victims at both ends of the gun." Ralph Larkin, author, Comprehending Columbine, advocates the need for a "peace educational program" built into school curriculums that focuses on nonviolent friction resolution as well as issues such as bullying. "We have to build much stronger maintain networks for kids," he says. Tom Simon of the Centers for Disease Control's department of Violence Preventions says, "There's only so much we can do as a society to keep places safe...The need is to focus on traditional prevention...There nothing else but is the potential if you start early and work with these kids. There is promise for traditional prevention."
We say our children are the future. Are we being the determined role model for a child in our life? Are we gift our maintain and guidance to a child we may know who is suffering? Are we taking a stand to enhance the educational ideas in our community? What are you doing to get ready a child for life? Don't go back to the dishes after reading this article. Don't get on the phone and make that enterprise appointment. Don't get into the "hampster" energy, of doing, doing, doing. Instead, take some quiet time and sit with what you've read--write about what spoke to you in this message, be introspective and don't stop. It takes perseverance and commitment to deal with our issues that will originate the perfect guidance to show up and maintain us on a regular basis. Just begin the process and then continue it. Start now--where you are at the moment, be unwilling to wait an additional one day. The Universe is there for you, if you only ask for help.
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